Using '5 Whys' to Make Hell Yes Decisions & Improve Your Relationships

In this episode of Hell Yes Habits, Elyse Bushard introduces the concept of the Five Whys method as a tool for self-reflection and decision-making. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the root causes of our feelings and decisions to lead a more fulfilling life. The conversation explores how this method can be applied not only in personal growth but also in relationships and professional settings, encouraging listeners to engage in deeper conversations and self-discovery.

Takeaways

• Finding what makes you feel good is essential.
• The Five Whys method helps uncover root causes.
• Self-reflection can lead to better decision-making.
• Understanding your 'why' strengthens your motivations.
• The method can be applied in personal and professional contexts.
• Curiosity can deepen relationships and self-understanding.
• It's okay to feel resistance; explore it with questions.

#HellYes Habits #FiveWhys #Curiousity #SelfReflection #Relationships #PersonalGrowth

Transcript

Elyse Bushard (00:06)
welcome to Hell Yes Habits. I'm Elyse, a marketing professional by day and your go-to coach for building the habits that create a life you can't wait to wake up to. I'm so glad you're here. This podcast is all about ditching the just fine mindset and making room for the magic in your everyday life. And let me tell you, this isn't just a podcast. It's the start of a movement, a Hell Yes Habits movement.

It's about breaking out of autopilot, showing up for yourself in ways that matter, and creating small but powerful habits that lead to a big, bold, hell yes kind of life. Each week, we'll have real, honest conversations about juggling all the things, career, relationships, family, and those moments when you just need you time. I'll share actionable tips, lessons from my own journey,

and inspiration to help you stop settling and start thriving, baby. You in?, let's do this.

Elyse Bushard (01:16)
ever found yourself saying, ugh, I just don't want to do this? What if I told you that pausing and asking why, not once, not twice, but five times could help you cut through the noise and make better decisions? Welcome back to Hell Yes Habits. I am just gonna get right into the topic today. I'm feeling a little...

a little fiery, but also reflective and like decisive and wanting to share like a philosophy that we actually use in marketing a lot. I work at a marketing agency and in order to understand like our clients pain points and really discover what the whys are.

you can actually apply to your life. And I want to show you how. today we're diving into the magical power of the five whys. So not just for like your everyday choices, but also how it shows up. I'm gonna like give you like how it shows up in marketing and the art of just asking better questions to like really understand the root why.

you're feeling a certain way personally, or the questions to ask other people to uncover their root cause to either help them with marketing, so something that can help you at work, or help you with a friendship or relationship in your life. It can be applied in many things, and this episode idea just came to me when I

we were doing this for a client at work and I was like, what if you like five why your life and like decisions that you're making? Because I don't know about you, but sometimes I get in moods that like, I don't want to make adult decisions. Adults have to make a lot of decisions. Like sometimes I wish I could just rewind and go back to being a child when your decisions are all made for you and all you get to focus on is eating, sleeping and pooping.

Like, where did that go? But anyways, let's go. I am fired up, like I said, and essentially, let me just discuss first of why the Five Wise method works. Essentially, it's just a quick, fun explanation of like, discovering the root cause of something. So,

If you are, if you're experiencing something like at work that you, you're like, the client's like, I don't want to do that or, or I don't feel like that's the right direction. Like they're just very adamant asking why like helps them reflect because

And all it is is like, well, why do you feel that way? And I know I sound like a therapist when I say that, but essentially you want to just five why, like to find, and I say five times, but like it's, it's a philosophy. I don't know who made it up. should credit them with it, but I don't actually know. Probably some guy came up with it. but, it is,

like a philosophy like to just dive deeper into explanations to get to that final root cause and understand so you can move forward. so essentially when you stop and ask yourself why five times, you get past, like I said, those surface excuses and down to the real reason why.

your or your client is resisting something or sometimes why it's actually not that important to push through. So a very simple example of this is like, I didn't want to work out this morning. Why? I was tired. Why? I stayed up too late scrolling. Why? I was avoiding an email. Why? Because I'm worried I messed something up. Why?

because I'm afraid of being seen as imperfect. Bam. We're not talking about the gym anymore and working out, are we? We literally five-wide it to understand why you don't like working out, but really that's not the actual issue. The issue is that you're afraid to be seen as imperfect and you, like, and that is the root cause. So like,

That's just a very simple example to explain how. And the way it could show up in your personal life. So that was just a very simple example. really, what you can do, this is again, gonna be a very simple episode because really what you can do is a quick five why.

it when you feel stuck. So when you feel like you can't make a decision, when you're like, I don't want to do something, well, why don't I want to do something and like sit there in that. And sometimes it's hard to come up with a why, right? But like processing through that, you can then understand, like, and validate yourself and your decision of why maybe you don't want to do something or why you do want to do it.

And so, for example, when I started my podcast, I was like, well, why do I want to start a podcast? And my why was not actually strong enough, like about a year and a half ago when I when it first started in my mind, like I was like, well, that would be cool to start a podcast. That is not a strong enough why.

And once I got to like this year and finally taking action, which by the way, if you haven't listened to previous episodes, I talk about confidence in the last episode and it talks about acting first and just trying like in the absence of that. like sometimes like I've always wanted to start a podcast. why did you want to start a podcast?

Because I want a strong community. Why? Because it helps me grow. Why? Because I'm bad at public speaking and I want to work on that. Why? Because it'll help me in my personal and professional life. So I actually broke that down from why, just starting a podcast to have a cool community.

to the real reason is actually pretty selfish. And I've explored that. And if you listen to my very first episode, which don't judge me, but that was my very first episode. If you listen to that, will dive in to like why it took me so long to start. And that was a limiting self belief that I had that I could even do it. And here we are 19 episodes in I acted.

But five why-ing that even, like I hope that gives you an example of how it could work in your life. So next time you resist something or even when you really want something, ask yourself why five times and see how far you get. You might actually surprise yourself with your answer and you can do this writing down or just talking it out like I'm doing right now.

You don't have to, like it doesn't have to be something formal. And then you can also do this with friends, like in relationships that you're trying to understand. So not just at work. I use it from work because we use it at work to literally figure out the root cause of why clients are talking about certain things and why they're resisting so much.

Because we don't understand, right? And we're not business owners. The majority of us, like other than the people who own our marketing company, we're not business owners. So we don't understand. So asking why and really uncovering that, and that comes with like relationships, but like doing that in your personal life with friendships and family members that you don't understand their perspective, it will surprise you how much it could deepen connections that you have.

And then also on the flip side of that, the connection with yourself. So, essentially what is one thing? This is going to be a short punchy episode because I'm telling you, I had a lot of energy, but I wanted like just a simple episode that you could pull from that is like purpose driven and it's not, and you can pull from it, from your personal life to your personal life, to relationships that you have.

and to your work life. So it can apply in multiple facets. what's one thing that you've been resisting lately? Pause and five why it and get clear. if like you've loved, you love this like punchier episode that doesn't take a lot of time for you to listen to, I would love to integrate at least one a month that I can just like give you some value really quick. Cause I know that

Like if you're like me and recording an episode on the day of that it is released, like we're all busy. so, but essentially what is one thing that you've been resisting lately? Paws and Five Wyatt. What is one thing that like be more curious in your life? Like I think that is also the overall message that I want to convey in this.

is not only the five whys and like, but how it can evoke more conversations, more meaningful conversations with relationships in your life, at work, in your personal life, everywhere. And then also with the relationship with ourself and really understanding that and like, invalidating our own feelings. Cause I feel like a lot of times I feel things

And I'm like, why am I feeling this way? And sometimes it is my time of the month and you don't want to mess with me, Ladies, but like, I, it's also sometimes like I need to dive deeper and reflect to understand myself and live a hell yes life. Cause I mean, that's what it's all about. So again, if you love these punchier, shorter episodes, let me know.

I would love to hear also like if you think that this is a cool perspective on or something new that you learned share it with a friend who you think would benefit from it like again I love this community and what it's growing to we literally I look this week and are almost to 200 downloads and it's gone international and I cannot believe that like shout out

to Bosnia, Australia, Germany, if you're listening into this, I love you guys and let me know any feedback you have. Review the podcast if you like it. That's the only way it grows. I'm not monetizing this at the moment. I don't know if I ever will, but I just want it to be a community and platform that people can go to to build a hell yes.

life with these hell yes habits and little tidbits. And yeah, let me know what you like and what you don't like and I love you and I hope you're having a great Friday.

Elyse Bushard (14:35)
If any part of this podcast gave you a hell yes moment, I would absolutely love to hear from you. You know here at Hell Yes Habits, we're all about finding what makes you feel good and turning your everyday habits into hell yes habits. We're building a community rooted in connection and growth and your voice is a huge part of that. If this episode was helpful for you, it would mean the world to me if you shared it.

on your Instagram stories and tagged me at Elise Bechard. Not only so I can thank you personally, but to help spread the word about this Hell Yes Habits movement. Thanks for hanging out with me today and I'll catch you next time. Let's keep creating those habits that light you up and build the life you deserve. Until then, go make it a Hell Yes Day.