A Hell Yes Habit: Romanticize Your Own Damn Life & Manifest Main Character Energy (Month of LOVE FebYOUary Series)

In this episode of Hell Yes Habits, Elyse Bushard emphasizes the importance of self-love and personal growth. She discusses the concept of 'romancing yourself' and shares her personal journey of self-discovery. Elyse encourages listeners to become the main character of their own lives and provides practical tips on how to romanticize everyday moments. The episode concludes with a reminder to celebrate oneself and to take actionable steps towards self-care and empowerment.

Takeaways

• Focus on what makes you feel good.
• Break out of autopilot and show up for yourself.
• Romance yourself by making every day feel magical.
• You are the main character of your life.
• Small moments of beauty can lead to big changes.
• Dress for the life you want, not just for comfort.
• Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small.
• Create a morning routine that energizes you.
• Take yourself out on dates to enjoy your own company.
• Community support is vital for personal growth.

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#selflove #personalgrowth #habits #selfcare #romanticizelife #selfdiscovery #HellYesHabits

Transcript

Elyse Bushard (00:06)
welcome to Hell Yes Habits. I'm Elise, a marketing professional by day and your go-to coach for building the habits that create a life you can't wait to wake up to. I'm so glad you're here. This podcast is all about ditching the just fine mindset and making room for the magic in your everyday life. And let me tell you, this isn't just a podcast. It's the start of a movement, a Hell Yes Habits movement.

It's about breaking out of autopilot, showing up for yourself in ways that matter, and creating small but powerful habits that lead to a big, bold, hell yes kind of life. Each week, we'll have real, honest conversations about juggling all the things, career, relationships, family, and those moments when you just need you time. I'll share actionable tips, lessons from my own journey,

and inspiration to help you stop settling and start thriving, baby. You in?, let's do this.

Elyse Bushard (01:16)
Welcome back to Hell Us Habits Podcast. It's February, or as I'm calling it, Feb-Y-O-U-ary, a month dedicated to you and everything love. I know that Valentine's Day is now over. I know if you listened to last episode, I celebrated by telling you everything not to say to a single person. It was a more funnier episode.

This episode, I want to focus on a different topic that is kind of unconventional. Again, I told you that at the beginning of this month, and if you haven't listened to the previous two episodes, they're in this same realm. It's like unconventional ways to think about love and topics and relationships and things like that. So this will be episode three of that series, and then the last one will be next week.

Also, I have to note because if you've been listening to my podcast, you know how last minute I am and I want it written down for the record that I am recording this Thursday, like the night before the podcast is releasing. Put it down in the record books. But back to the podcast topic. I to be totally transparent of what's going on in my life.

This week on Monday, I completely biffed it. Like, wasn't even repaired black ice. The weather's been weird here. It's been like cold and warm and so I did not even see it coming. Biffed it in the parking lot of my work and have been out for the count like until now when I finally tried to work out, got halfway through it was like, at least your body isn't ready for this. But

I feel a lot better. It felt like I had whiplash. I'm still very stiff and my body still feels kind of out of alignment. But here we are. And yeah, I am thankful that it didn't end up being anything more serious than it was, although I have huge bruises on my butt and lower back. But we're alive.

and it had just sucked all week. And of course this happens during the week of the month that my period is too, the lovely time of the month that us women deal with. So it's been like an emotional roller coaster this week because I haven't been able to do all of the things that I need to do to take care of myself. And so I've been trying, like working out for example, or

going out for a while. I've just been so stiff and trying to just mend my body. So here we are. It's February, Y-O-U month and whether like let's dive into the podcast here. But whether you're single in a relationship or somewhere in between, today's episode is all about actually falling in love with your own damn life. Because let's be real.

When was the last time you made yourself feel special? Just because today we're talking about how to essentially quote unquote romance yourself. And before you put your like you think your mind's in the gutter, we're not talking about that. We're talking about how to make the everyday feel magical. I don't know why I needed to say that, but like I felt like that's where my mind was going. So I know I'm not the only one.

But it's how to make everyday feel magical and why waiting for someone else to bring you flowers or romance you is overrated. And so let's dive into this because it's time to start living a life that feels good right now and not waiting for something or someone. I wanna start out by just saying a personal story.

I didn't realize that I need to put myself first until a few years ago. it all started, if you didn't know, I was a body coach. They've since then dissolved that area. But like, I became a body coach, honestly, to just focus on myself.

and work out and I worked out at home for like over five years consistently showing up for myself at least six to seven days a week for five years and it wasn't until I started getting into a routine I realized how important it was and how much neglect I just haven't been focusing on myself and as an Enneagram 2

That is the helper. If you're not familiar with the Enneagrams, go take a free Enneagram test. It is so eye-opening when you start realizing the people around you, your coworkers, your friends, like what they are and like how to relate to them better. It wasn't until I started working at the marketing agency that I'm working at right now that I was exposed to this Enneagram thing. And it's like a personality test on steroids, but it's amazing. So.

If you want a link for the one that we use at work, can send it to you. There's a bunch of free versions of it though. You have to be careful though, because sometimes it'll ask you to take it and at the end to get your results, it will show you a price to get your results. I'm not all about that. There is free ones out there. But anyways.

Back to what I saying, is I don't focus on myself. I'm an engram too. I tend to put others before myself, which can be a good thing, right? And an admirable thing, but it also can be detrimental because I don't focus on myself. And I learned that through working out and through like, on myself, through working out,

but also just making time for myself and pockets of my day that I'm just focused on myself. I realized that I was, instead of making life happen for me, I was just letting it happen to me. And if you're like that, then you're just in reaction mode, right?

So you are, because someone's mad at you, it ruins your entire day, for example. That's kind of a basic example. like, I realized that life wasn't just happening to me. It was just happening to me, not for me. And I had this thought, like, is this it? This was like the beginning of my 30s, like, am I gonna feel like this forever? Because it wasn't,

bad, right? But it wasn't great. And we all deserve great. And so I started to realize that like, if I don't start making my own life feel special, who will? And especially as a single lady, like, I do everything for myself. When I'm sick, I still have to do laundry and like other things to function, right? There's no one

here to actually take care of me. I'm very independent in that way, which is also a good thing and it could be a bad thing. like, I realized that like, if I can do all of these things, then I can for sure carve out time to work on myself. And in this example, working out consistently, because it made me feel better mentally. And so,

That was the moment I feel like that comes up. mean, there's been multiple moments, but like that was the moment for me that came up that like I stopped waiting for the right circumstances, the right relationship, the right anything, the right time, and started just showing up for me and keeping promises to myself. And I want, and I envisioned and wanted to be the kind of person

who woke up excited and who romanticized even the smallest parts of my day and paused and said, thanks, like, thank you and was grateful. And so I made a choice, and this is gonna sound a little ridiculous, but it was like, I'm gonna start making dates with myself. I'm gonna start dating myself. And that leads into another part of this.

in the mindset shift that I had is that I am the main character of my life and you are the main character of your life. And so one of the biggest lies though that we've been fed is that romance is something someone else gives us. All these fairy tales, these Disney stories, which I'm a big Disney girl, so I'm not dissing Disney, but I'm saying that we are not

damsels in distress that need someone to save us. we're the main character of our story. so it's time to start acting like it. It means showing up for yourself the way you wish someone else would. And it means looking at your life through the lens of curiosity and wonder and maybe even a little bit of drama, because why not?

And so think about, so I brought up movies a little bit, like Disney movies, but think about your favorite movie or book or even someone who inspires you in your life. What makes them feel interesting? Like either when you're watching them on social media or they are, or,

It's in your favorite movie or book and they're acting. And usually if you pinpoint what it is about them, it's not always this big dramatic moment. It's the way that person moves through the world. The way she lights up the world and people gravitate towards her because she is uniquely herself.

and she picks out an outfit, for example, that makes her feel like a badass, or she takes herself out for coffee just because she can, and she's living her life. That type of energy is what we need to bring into our everyday life, because that person that you inspire to be, whether it's a character in a book or a movie or

in real life. And I say real life in quotes because if you're watching someone on Instagram, I guarantee their life isn't perfect. But what makes them someone that you aspire to be? And usually it's something small. Like some people I follow on Instagram, I swear, it's because they dance to music in their car. They tell me that...

they fell down on the ice, for example, like I did. Like they tell me all and how they're laughing through it. That's inspirational. That's unique. And we need to start treating ourselves like that and putting ourselves out there and romanticizing our own life, taking action. So I keep saying this, like romanticize your own life and ways.

But here are the ways that you can do that and technical things. You can romanticize your morning routine and your habits when you wake up. So I think we all know that morning set the tone for the day. So why not make them feel like a little love letter to yourself? Like instead of just rolling out of bed and being like, my God, and

Believe me, I have those days. I am not a morning person. But instead of rolling out of bed and diving straight into your phone in the first five seconds, like try this instead. Put on a playlist that makes you feel like the lead in your favorite movie or book. Make your morning coffee or tea. I've been really into tea. I have coffee on the weekends, tea during the week.

I don't know. Use your favorite mug. Like I have a bunch of mugs. I love mugs that have quotes on them and sayings and things. Add a little cinnamon to your tea or coffee and make it feel like a special little date with yourself. Or if you're like me, I listen to personal growth in the morning. I think I've said this on multiple episodes, but growth day, I can get you a seven day trial PS. It is...

an amazing app that you can listen to personal growth. So I listen to that first thing in the morning, every morning, even on the weekends when I wake up a little later, I listen to this because it helps get my mindset right. And I have it with my morning tea. And that is like my morning, like it gets my mojo, my juju going, if you will. And it's

It also just sets the tone for my day. Another thing you could do is light a candle, wear a cozy robe that you love, dance in your kitchen. I used to that all the time as a body coach. I should bring that back. I am not a good dancer, PS, but if you have been following me on social media, you can scroll back at some of my reels and I do dance, mostly to 90s and 2000s hip hop. But whatever makes you feel

Like, and it doesn't have to be 30 minutes, it could be 10 minutes. Some of the personal growth that I listen to is like 10 minutes or less. And it just sets the tone for my day. So then I can dive into my phone and other people's things. like, romanticizing your morning routine, that is just, it's chef's kiss, it's perfect. Number two, take yourself out on dates.

This sounds weird. I know. But if you want to go do something and you can't find anyone else to do it at the time you want to do it, just go do it.

I learned this, I was like, okay, well I really want to try this coffee shop. I don't need to wait for someone to try the coffee shop with me. I can go and sit by myself. I know some people don't feel comfortable at it, but there's nothing wrong with it. And no one judges you, except for maybe yourself. So it's probably a problem that you have. And you don't need a plus one to go somewhere nice. So if there's a restaurant you've been dying to try, go.

I still have not done that other than fast food type restaurants. But if you want to go on a weekend getaway, book it. One of my favorite things that I've ever done spontaneously is I booked a trip to, and this was to visit a friend, so maybe this doesn't count.

I booked a trip in a weekend in advance to go see one of my friends, but I traveled by myself. It's fine. At first, it's like you feel weird and people are judging you again. But then I realized that no one cares. Everyone is so self-involved and no one cares. It actually felt freeing because I was like, can try all the...

you're giving yourself permission to try new things. So here's your challenge with that. Plan a solo date this month. It could be a coffee shop, a museum trip, or even just getting dressed up for a sunset walk, like with your favorite drink in hand and just walking. So that's number two. Take yourself on dates.

Number three is find the moments of beauty in every day. Romance isn't just about big gestures. So not the dozen million roses that were bought on Valentine's Day. It's about seeing magic in the small little moments and things. So that means like wearing perfume just for you.

Writing yourself love notes or affirmations on your mirror or even saying them to yourself in the mirror. I know it sounds weird, but it actually makes a difference to see yourself, the reflection of you saying it, to reaffirm it. And then there's also treating yourself to fresh flowers. I don't know if anyone's heard about this song by Miley Cyrus, I Can Buy Myself Flowers.

but it's so true and it's so empowering. But don't do it just because it's a special occasion, but because you are the occasion and you deserve to be loved and showered with things and celebrate those little moments. Number four is dress for the life you want.

And I am not the best at this because as a work from home person, especially this week, you could have not paid me to wear real clothes because I fell on the ice and the only thing that was comfortable was leggings or sweatpants on the bottom. And so I did have business and stuff on the top, party on the bottom. But I love a good oversized hoodie as much as the next girl, but sometimes

The best thing you can do is put on an outfit that makes you feel confident and hot and sexy. And not for anyone else, but for you. It for sure shifts your energy instantly. And so maybe this week, wear that dress you've been saving. Put on some lipstick. I'm not a lipstick person, but sometimes when I put it on, I feel even fiercer.

and walk with a little more confidence and see just how it changes your mindset and the way, like your posture and the way that you hold yourself up. And number five, I think I talk about this a couple times in previous podcasts, but celebrate yourself out loud. It is how you can be the main character in your own life because

The truth is we don't celebrate ourselves enough. So here's what I want you to do. At the end of each day, find one thing that you're proud of. Maybe you spoke up in a meeting at work. Maybe you moved your body. I tried today. So that's gonna be one of the things I'm proud of. I didn't get through a full workout, but I got through half of it. And...

Or maybe you simply survived a hard day. It was emotional for you. You didn't understand why you were so emotional. But then you realized that you hadn't been able to work out all week and you were on your period. That was me this week. But all of those little things, say them out loud. Write them down, even if it's typing them out in your notes on your phone. Or if you're like me, you use the Growth Day app, hint, hint.

But acknowledge it because when you start to notice the magic in your own life, it multiplies. And if you're consistent at it, it amplifies your confidence and it makes you feel amazing. I need to work on this, but I try to think of three things at least that I was proud of myself for the day. It helps my confidence.

It also just helps me feel grateful for the stage of life that I'm at, the season of life. I almost ran out of breath there. don't know why. I need to remember to breathe. But yeah, so that was a lot. I'm going to go through these one more time. So these are how you can romanticize yourself, make yourself the main character in your own life. Romanticize your mornings. Get your head out of the gutter, though. I'm not talking about that.

I am talking about romanticizing your mornings, finding a morning routine that really just makes you feel cozy and ready for the day and energizes you. It can be five minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes, whatever you want to carve out, but it doesn't have to be like this extensive thing. Number two, take yourself out on dates.

to a coffee shop, to a restaurant. Just do something that you've always wanted to do and do it spontaneously because that's even more fun. Number three, find beauty in every day. In the little moments, write yourself love notes, treat yourself to fresh flowers, all of that. Number four, dress for the life you want. Dress up more.

wear outfits that make you feel confident, sexy, and hot. Number five, celebrate yourself out loud. Write it down, say it out loud.

Don't acknowledge that you are moving forward and it will amplify, I promise.

I know that was a lot, but also it was helpful for me to say these things out loud because I don't honestly do these things enough.

I'm sure I maybe do them a lot more than other people because I am single. And if you are single and you're listening to this, I bet you do find more moments to focus on yourself because it's easier, right? I don't have children. I am acknowledging that. But there's little things that you can do too as a mom, as a wife that can...

or if men are listening to this, don't mean to leave you out, but this is for millennial women, I'm just putting it out there. Or even, I think I have boomers listening to this as well, hello boomer women, because my family. And I've lost train of thought. yes, if you, like it's harder, I'm sure, to focus on yourself. You have a million things that you're wanting to,

A million different people and things pulling you in a million different directions, but I'm here to tell you that it doesn't have to be hard it can be small and tangible and The main thing I want you to remember is this you are not an afterthought You're not a supporting character You are the main character the main event and your life

It deserves to feel good, not someday, but right now. So stop waiting. Start showing up for yourself the way you've always wanted someone else to. Romance yourself. Treat yourself like the love of your life, because honestly, you are, and you are the person you are going to spend the most time with until the day you die.

and

It's so important to realize this, that we need to spend time with ourselves and love ourselves and love every aspect that makes us unique. Before you go though, I know that I say this I think in the closing, but this week I want you to do one thing.

one shift in your routine or try out one of the steps that I said and let me know whatever that is. If you do, do it for you and if you do, tag me on Instagram. My Instagram handle is at ELYSEBichard, B-U-S-H-R-R-D. So I can hype you up because

things happen in community when we support each other and we should all support each other in different ways to love ourselves because no one is gonna love you as much as you love you. So if this episode resonated with you as always share it please. That's the only way that this podcast grows. I don't have ads or anything.

I actually have people listening to it in other countries, which is crazy to me. But here we are. And I think we're 150 dollars in. And I'm so excited. But if this episode resonated with you as all like share with a friend who needs a little reminder to focus on themselves and romanticize their own life. And if you haven't yet, please, please, please also leave a review.

It helps spread this message so much in my podcast reach other people in different other corners of Colorado and nationally and internationally But until then and until next time go make your life feel like a hell. Yes Why? Because you deserve it

Elyse Bushard (30:06)
If any part of this podcast gave you a hell yes moment, I would absolutely love to hear from you. You know here at Hell Yes Habits, we're all about finding what makes you feel good and turning your everyday habits into hell yes habits. We're building a community rooted in connection and growth and your voice is a huge part of that. If this episode was helpful for you, it would mean the world to me if you shared it.

on your Instagram stories and tagged me at Elise Bechard. Not only so I can thank you personally, but to help spread the word about this Hell Yes Habits movement. Thanks for hanging out with me today and I'll catch you next time. Let's keep creating those habits that light you up and build the life you deserve. Until then, go make it a Hell Yes Day.