A Reminder: Fill Your Cup First For the Best Version of You

In this episode of Hell Yes Habits, Elyse Bushard emphasizes the importance of self-care and prioritizing oneself to lead a fulfilling life. She discusses the common tendency to prioritize others over oneself, particularly among women, and shares personal experiences that highlight the need for self-focus. Elyse provides practical strategies for filling one's cup, including creating a morning routine, taking breaks, and engaging in activities that bring joy. The episode encourages listeners to shift their mindset towards self-care, reinforcing that caring for oneself is essential for being able to support others effectively.

Takeaways

• You can't fill someone else's cup if yours is empty.
• Prioritizing yourself is crucial for overall well-being.
• Small acts of self-care can lead to significant changes.
• Creating a morning routine can set a positive tone for the day.
• Engaging in activities that energize you is essential.
• Recognizing when you're drained is the first step to self-care.
• Self-focus doesn't have to be time-consuming or complicated.
• Caring for yourself is not selfish; it's necessary.
• Building habits that serve you can lead to a fulfilling life.
• Community support is vital in the journey of personal growth.

Transcript

Elyse Bushard (00:06)
welcome to Hell Yes Habits. I'm Elise, a marketing professional by day and your go-to coach for building the habits that create a life you can't wait to wake up to. I'm so glad you're here. This podcast is all about ditching the just fine mindset and making room for the magic in your everyday life. And let me tell you, this isn't just a podcast. It's the start of a movement, a Hell Yes Habits movement.

It's about breaking out of autopilot, showing up for yourself in ways that matter, and creating small but powerful habits that lead to a big, bold, hell yes kind of life. Each week, we'll have real, honest conversations about juggling all the things, career, relationships, family, and those moments when you just need you time. I'll share actionable tips, lessons from my own journey,

and inspiration to help you stop settling and start thriving, baby. You in?, let's do this.

Elyse Bushard (01:15)
Hello, hello and welcome to Hell Yes Habits. I am your host, I'm Elise Bichard and I am welcome back and thanks for listening. just, full transparency, just recorded a full episode and didn't press record and so it didn't save. But here we are and you're along with me for the ride and the journey.

This episode I wanted to be just kind of short and in your face and more of just like a simple concept. But first I have a question. Has anyone ever felt completely drained by noon? But then you realize you haven't done anything for yourself all day and that could be why. My focus today is just gonna be I wanna give you guys

like examples, but also just tactical things that I do when this happens to me, because I know it happens to other women. I've had conversations with you and you just don't have any energy or motivation. And this is probably one of the many reasons why. And it's definitely one of the reasons that I struggle with and I still struggle with.

Especially since I'm going to say it as women we tend to prioritize other people before priorities Prioritizing ourself and as I get older I'm realizing just How much that is affecting me and draining me? And I also have people pleasing tendencies. I don't know if anyone else can relate. I'm sure that

that can also be women related, but I feel like men also experience it that too, where they pour into other people before they pour into themselves and they want people to like them and gravitate towards them. So they keep emptying their cup and doing stuff for others. And, and then we end up with a situation where our cup is empty. And so this episode is going to be, like I said, kind of like

I'm gonna tie in just some personal examples, but then it's gonna be kind of tactical. I want to give you guys actionable things that maybe can help you get out of this situation. So the theme is that I wanna remind us of is something very simple and powerful. I've never, I saw this in a book that I was reading and it's very simple and I'm sure you've heard versions of this,

I love how simplified this is. It's you can't fill someone else's cup if yours is empty. And again, very simple. But in order for this all to make sense, I want to tie in essentially like my day today and why this sprung a podcast episode for you is that

I work from home and sometimes my energy just feels depleted. And you know you have those days where you're just on and you're productive and that's normal. It's normal to ebb and flow with that. But also there are things that we can do when we notice that our energy is depleted. So today, for example, and why this podcast episode was sparked is that

I, at about one o'clock, I had my normal routine, morning routine. I listen to a personal growth app every morning and I have my either tea or I use this supplement called Miracle Worker as well. I, while I get up, I make my bed, I listen to my personal growth app. I get ready for the day, depending on if I'm going to work or not, my morning routine tweaks a little bit.

because I work hybrid, so I work at a marketing agency and we work from home sometimes and sometimes I have to go into work to meet with clients. But essentially, painting the picture, at about 1pm today, I was like, my gosh, I'm so frustrated. I cannot focus on anything. I was feeling like extreme brain fog, right? I couldn't focus on anything. I wasn't being productive and I knew I had to get some stuff done and so,

I was staring at my computer and things that usually come easy to me did not come easy to me. And I started pacing around my house. I started getting frustrated. And then I paused and I was like, why am I feeling like this at 1 p.m. today? I didn't understand. And then I was like, my god, I did not.

do my full morning routine today for some reason. Like I did not move my body. I didn't pause my day to take a walk or do something like that. like usually that's what energizes me to keep going. Like it's a lot to like work and pour into other people for a certain amount of time and clients and work that I'm doing. And I wasn't doing that. And so like

The first thing was like I was aware that I did not do that and so then immediately I was like duh, Elise. Like there is something in my brain like sometimes that I have to like reframe that like I'm gonna say it again especially women like we're conditioned to put others first whether it's work, your family, your friends. I used to think though that if I just

push through things, like everything would be fine. But what I didn't realize is how much better everything became when I started focusing on myself and pouring into myself first. Like I'm able to give a better version of myself and my skill set and everything to other people and things that I care about.

So this whole concept of filling up your cup, like what does that mean? And really that just means taking small but meaningful and purposeful acts of like self-care or self-focus is what I like to say that energize you. And it doesn't have to be something huge. Some examples of this that I've used or I've heard that

other people use are taking 10 minutes in the morning to move your body. Go for a walk. Take a pause midday to move your body for 30 minutes, 20 minutes, 10 minutes. Enjoying a cup of coffee in silence. Journaling or practicing gratitude in your head, listing out three things you're thankful for. Just pausing.

and listing those out in your head. You don't have to write them down. Or just engaging in something you love to do, even if it's five minutes, and pouring into something that doesn't feel like work, and it's for you. It's not for anyone else. And only you can really choose what those things are. But I just want to emphasize the simplicity of this concept of filling up your cup, because it doesn't have to be this like,

big grand thing and but yet something so simple is overlooked in a busy day. Like we go from task to task and we're hurrying and this is gonna become really apparent in the holidays when our schedule gets even more nuts. And if you have a family, I do not personally have a family, but like I know my friends have kids and

it's navigating all of their schedules with your own. But it's so important, yet so easy to forget to focus on ourselves. self-care is like a buzzword to me. I really like the word self-focus. these small things also can become hell yes habits.

because they make you feel good. And that's what I'm all about. This hell yes habits movement that I wanna start. It doesn't have to be this grand thing. It can be small little things that if you do them consistently, you will feel like a heap of reward from it. so now just breaking it down. So if I were to say like tactical things that I did,

personally, like today, when I first, now don't get, I'm sure we all get frustrated, but like I did get frustrated. I was pacing around my house and I was like, I need to get this done. And then I just stressed myself out even further. And then I paused for a second and I was like, but why am I feeling like this frustrated? And so the first step was just

identifying and asking the question like when you're drained. really that just comes down to recognizing when your energy is low. When you're irritable, when you have brain fog, when you're just tired and you don't understand why. It can literally be because you haven't poured into yourself. So really that just comes with identifying when you're drained, a quick self

So ask yourself, have you done anything for yourself today? Literally asking the question, have I done anything for me today? And then creating those micro moments of self-focus or self-care. So like little things like that you can do.

after you identify like a list of things that make you feel good and fill up your cup, and again, these don't need to be complicated, is you can set a timer for a quick break to stretch, walk, or breathe. I actually have a timer every hour to look just away from my computer because I can get into something so much that my eyes, I wear contacts so my eyes get dry. So physically that's bad.

But also mentally just looking away from my computer is like a break and it is like maybe one to two minutes and then I go back to work. Also when things frustrate me and things like that, I close my eyes and I say release, Brendan Bouchard actually came up with this concept and he

And it's something that like you just close your eyes and if you're frustrated with something you release it. So the tension leaves your body. So whenever I'm frustrated with something, whether that be myself or someone else or a situation that I can't control, I use that as well. And keeping a list of hell yes activities. So things that genuinely.

just light you the F up and make you feel good and choose one each day. So just to integrate into your life when you're feeling drained or when you feel depleted. And then the last one and probably one of the most important things that shifted everything for me is to have a morning routine that starts with yourself.

even if it's just five minutes. So I, for example, of my running team, I get up, I make my bed, I try not to pick up my phone, although I have failed at this, I'm being honest, I have failed at this yesterday and today of checking social media, my email, or text messages. I try not to do those things. The only thing, my alarm is on my phone, so I turn off my alarm.

And then I go to my Growth Day app. And that's my personal development app. I will put a link for you in the show notes for that if you're interested in that at all. You get a free trial. So it's an amazing app. I'm just telling you, you can do all of these things that I am talking about in that app. It tracks everything. It can set reminders for you.

but it literally is for personal growth. But my morning routine is I make my bed, I turn on my personal development app, and I get some hot water with either a tea or something, and I sit on my, I used to sit outside, but now it's a little chilly in the morning when I wake up, so I sit on the couch and I look outside. And that is just.

part of my morning routine. And then I wash my face and I get ready for the day. And again, me getting ready for the day is almost like not pouring into myself anymore because I have to look presentable for work. the reasoning for me is disconnected. those moments that I created, and again, sometimes that shifts and I do my movement, like a workout or a walk or something like that.

either midday or in the morning or sometimes in the evening. My schedule varies, but I try to get some sort of movement in and some sort of outside time in. But a morning routine is integral is what I want to say to like a routine, a morning routine that starts with you, even if it's five minutes. And then if you think you don't have time, you do.

first of all, I'm gonna be tough love here, you do. You just, that little tiny investment in your morning routine and integrating like those three things, like setting a timer for a quick break or something that you wanna do that you know will help you and energize you throughout the day, keeping a list of hell yes activities to do.

it when that timer reminds you and that could be like two or three times a day. It could be every hour like I have it to look away from your computer. And then having that morning routine that tiny like those like three tiny shifts will pay off in how you show up for everyone else. I'm telling you when you're able to do that.

and you're able to show up for yourself and prioritize yourself, you will like exponentially be able to show up for other people like you want to and show up as the best version of you. And again, I know this is a simple concept, but it's taken me 36, almost 37 years to learn. So I'm sure that some of you are in the same boat and I still struggle with it every day, but what has helped me is being aware.

of the fact that I need to fill up my own cup before serving others. I mean, caring for yourself is not selfish. I'm gonna say that one more time. Caring for yourself is not selfish. It's, but rather it's giving you the energy to serve others better.

And again, I know that this is simple concept and if you're still with me, thank you first of all. But also just, I encourage you to reflect on your day today and find a small way right now to fill up your cup right now today.

I know that it is like we're being pulled in a million different directions and there's so many things that are out of our control going on around us and we have people pleasing tendencies and we have things that we struggle with. But the one thing that you can control is shifting your mindset to focus more on yourself and

the fact that we have the...

the capability to fill up our own cups because you can't fill someone else's cup if yours is empty. You just can't. Simple, plain truth coming at ya. I hope this was helpful. Thank you so much for listening. Hell Yes Hobbits is a community of movement that I wanted to start honestly to just

into you guys and a prior version of myself that was struggling with doing things for other people and never prioritizing myself. And I wanna be that resource for you guys when you need that pep talk. But also this podcast is built on community.

So I would love to hear from you. If you found something in this episode that's helpful, please share it. I will and tag me in your Instagram stories. My handle is in the show notes. It's at E-L-Y-S-E B-U-S-H-A-R-D. But also just thank you. Thank you for listening. Thank you. I will also put the

a link like I said to the personal growth app that I used and mentioned that I use every day. And there's a free trial for that. So again, just providing you with all the tools here. I believe in you. And I want you to have and create hell yes habits that are personalized to you for that hell yes life that you deserve.